I Wanted To Write Today

"My daily affairs are quite ordinary;

but I'm in total harmony with them."

~ Layman P'ang

I wanted to write today, but first I had to sit in the backyard on a warm September morning and drink a cup of coffee. I exchanged gratitude and sweet text messages with someone I adore. I read my email. I learned that a friend was sharing a reflection on his year with cancer at a Yom Kippur service this morning. And it was being live streamed. So I listened and cried a little.

I wanted to write today, but I had to make cinnamon swirl French toast with raspberries and powered sugar for my kids. And we needed to talk a little. About stuff. Then I caught up with a dear friend who does not get the attention she deserves from me. Oh, and I sent a message to my friend with cancer to tell him how moved I was by the hope, love, gratitude, acceptance and life in his words. And I tried to atone for my absence in his life.

I wanted to write today, but every dish in the house was dirty and piled up on the kitchen counter. So I listened to my new CD by "The Civil Wars" and washed them all, one plate, one pot, one fork at a time.  And I swept up the little dots of paper from the hole punch my son used 3 days ago, scattered like snow flakes on the dining room floor. There was laundry in the washing machine that had been waiting for its turn in the dryer for over 24 hours. I helped it find its way. Then I needed to hustle the kids. They had pool parties and soccer games to get to.

I wanted to write today, but I had to go to Costco for a case of beer and birth control pills, doing my part to advance the reputation of single mothers everywhere! Then I hurried to the soccer fields to watch my son's team play an exciting come from behind match, relishing the sunny afternoon and the exuberance of 12 year old boys. And I went to the grocery store to buy eggs and mushrooms, Swiss cheese, heavy cream and frozen pie crusts, ingredients for the quiche my daughter needed to make for a youth group fundraiser in the morning.

I wanted to write today, but I had to walk the dog on the bluffs above the ocean by my house before dinner. I had to watch the sun begin to sink toward the horizon. I stopped to  watch and experience awe and wonder. There's a law that says you have to do that when you come across a sunset. I think there's a law that says you have to share a photo of it on Facebook now too, but I didn't do that. I watched the shadows lengthen and felt the air grow chilly. Then I walked home and my kids and I got  big, fat burritos from Chipotle. After dinner we dished out bowls of mint chip ice cream before settling down on the couch together to watch a movie. We are exploring science fiction these days, questioning reality.

I wanted to write today, but life happened. And I decided to show up for it.